Every morning I love to start my day by reading a chapter from Proverbs or Psalm, it helps me get into the right mindset for the day. This past week, a verse from Psalm 39 stuck in my head. “I said “I will guard my was that I may not sin with my tongue, I will guard my mouth with a muzzle so as long as the wicked are in my presence.” Psalm 39:1. I’m not going to lie, I felt a little called out by this verse when I read it. I have always been a firm believer in the saying that actions speak louder than words, but lately, I haven’t really been living by that if I’m being honest. I read this verse right at the perfect time and it was such a good reminder of just how powerful words can be. Our words can hold the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21) which means it's so important to remember that when speaking we need to make sure we are speaking words that are going to bring life. Yes, these are basic reminders but they’re so powerful, and sometimes you just need to go back to the basic life lessons.
It’s so easy to quickly snap at someone when they make you mad. Trust me, no one can turn into Beth Dutton faster than me when someone offends the people I care about. But it's in those moments where we can make the biggest impact in a negative or positive way. When you’re about to go off on someone, think about how powerful your words and actions could be on that person if you chose to do the opposite instead and show them grace. When you let your anger, frustration, and jealousy bleed out onto others it creates a bigger mess. But when you let God’s love pour out through you that is when you have the opportunity to make the biggest impact. Let’s circle back to the statement “Actions speak louder than words” Yes words hold extreme power I said earlier but many times the way you choose to act can hold even more. If you look at how Jesus lived you’ll see that he always chose to act in a Godly way, which led him to live a sinless life. To me, this has always been one of the most fascinating things about Jesus, and makes me love Him even more. He chose to die on a cross to save us and that is the greatest action of all time. Now obviously the things Jesus said made incredible impacts but the actions he chose to do also made an impact.
Something I’ve learned from being sorority chaplain so far is that although I may never be able to directly share the gospel with all of my sisters (because 600+ is a lot y’all!!!) but I can still influence their lives by the way I act. People may never remember the things you said but they will always remember the way you acted towards them or others. Think about a time when you thought someone was really mean and people may have asked why you thought that person was so awful and you can’t think of a specific reason but just that they were not nice. This is probably because of the way they acted and carried themselves, and it was not the nicest. This is why it is so important that we try to mirror Christ and the way he acted and lived his life.
I know that we’ve all heard the saying and it probably came from your mom that if you don’t have something nice to say then you shouldn’t say it all. This statement couldn’t be more true. I know it’s so easy to join in on the gossip when you walk into the sorority dining room and everyone is talking about that one girl who embarrassed herself at the date party last night. We are all guilty of gossiping about others, but at what cost? We speak poorly about others or join in on stupid gossip at the expense of others just so we can feel a little bit better about our own insecurities. But at the end of the day speaking poorly or starting rumors isn’t going to fix anything inside of you. I’ve been the person to gossip and say some really awful things about people and yeah it made me feel better about myself for a minute because I put them down so I could look a little bit better than them but it never brought anything good. I was only able to fix my own insecurities by bringing them to the cross. And now I just feel bad that I said or did those things because like I said it didn’t bring any good and actually just made me feel worse. Your sorority sister could have had a really bad night at that date party because she's struggling with something inside that no one sees and spreading a rumor isn’t going to help her, it’s actually just going to make her feel worse. Imagine if you were the one to show her grace and chose not to partake in the gossip, see what kind of positive impact that could make not just on her but others as well? Not only could it influence that sister but others as well when they see you choose not to participate in tearing others down and could encourage them to do the same. Sometimes we seek to use our words and actions as a way to get back at others for something that we feel they wronged us for. But is that really going to make you feel better? The answer is no. As I said earlier when you let your hurt bleed out onto others it just makes things worse. Making up rumors just to get back at someone is so sad and will only make you feel worse in the long run.
As Christians, we are called to live differently than the rest of the world and be disciples of Christ. When someone is speaking poorly about you or manages to push all your buttons at once we are supposed to show grace. I know this is all something we struggle with but we are supposed to turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:39). This is what I’m talking about when I say that actions can speak so loudly. When we choose to react in a negative way we are not allowing God’s love to pour out through us and giving the enemy a foothold. But if we react with a kind word or sometimes no response is the best response, then we are letting the love of God pour out and reach others. The way we conduct ourselves is crucial. This doesn’t even have to be during conflicts with others but how we handle situations like the way we act while in a bar or when everyone complains about that one awful professor but you choose to be the positive voice. As Christians, we are on a mission every single day. You can show God’s love in the workplace, classroom, sorority house, bar or frat party, etc simply by the way you carry yourself and the choices you make. This is such a simple reminder but it's so powerful and I’m not only talking about it for others to hear but for myself as well. Words have the power of life and death and our actions can make waves positive or negative.